Friday, October 10, 2008

The October Surprise


The political types have been speculating on an “October Surprise” in the presidential election. 

I’ve discovered the October Surprise.  I found it when I checked my retirement fund today.  It felt like a cold wind up my britches leg.   I am surprised to learn that were I to retire today, I would have enough money to… for every day of my remaining life… be able to buy one item from this list:

  • Half of a Happy Meal
  • Four sheets of toilet paper
  • One frozen chicken patty
  • Three doggy treats
  • A small candle (for heat, and light)
  • Two Vienna Sausages, or 1 tablespoon of Potted Meat
  • Deodorant for one underarm
  • 30 seconds of a Vol Football pay-per-view (which is about all I could stand)
  • Health care (two Advil tablets, or  a Band-Aid)
  • Psychiatric Care (a rubber squeeze ball)
  • Dental Care (a toothbrush)
  • Toothpaste (see above)
  • Enough gasoline to power a model plane for one minute

I think the October Surprise is our economic implosion.  And if it ain’t ..keep the other surprise to yourself.

Posted by Dave Foulk at 03:32:21
Comments

3 Responses to “The October Surprise”

  1. Your blog is impressive,it is always in my mind after i read it.

  2. highly readable and, in part, quite entertaining….the website is certainly worth a visit

  3. nit5489 says:

    A very good blog, I will often come to see.

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