The Creaking And Groaning Of An Old Typist
For those who have never had a shot in a finger or wrist joint, I refer you to the many Tom And Jerry Cartoons where ‘ol Tom the cat would get his paw smashed by Jerry the mouse. Tom’s paw would swell up about ten times its normal size and you would hear “boing boing boing” as it pulsated much to the cat’s horror. That is what a cortisone shot feels like in your hand.
There used to be a time when I could type at a blistering hundred words a minute for hours at a time. There also used to be a time when I had hair, didn’t need extra-wide shoes, and my real teeth had a two-thirds majority over the fake ones. Things change.
But would we want it any other way? What if there was a medical procedure that would allow us to stay young forever? How scary. After all, would you want to have children when you are 60. You could attend their high school graduation in a hearse.
If everybody looked young and we were in public, how would we know who to cast that all-knowing “look at those young idiots” to another person our age. Going to the drug store would be boring. We wouldn’t be able to buy pills by the scoop, like we used to buy candy in the Sears and Robuck store.
How would doctors afford those nice cars if all of us stayed disgustingly healthy?
If we were all young forever, there would be no people from Ohio left to drive slow in the left lane of the interstate.
And Tenncare would be so well off with all of us healthy and young, it would be called Ninecare
